5 Baffling Video Game Marketing Schemes

Being a consumer isn’t easy anymore. It’s noisy out there. It’s like for every useful piece of technology that takes our troubles away (like the Slap Chop), there’s a whole media storm of crap being thrown in our face, designed to steal our hard earned dollars with failed promises (Extenze!). Luckily, video game companies know how dumb we are. They have very flashy marketing campaigns to help get our attention, and we thank them for it.

However, in the process, sometimes they come up with weird, misleading, awesome, inappropriate or just all together baffling promos. Here are 5 of the most recent standouts.

5. EA’s “Sin to Win” contest for Dante’s Inferno
The Deal:
At Comic-Con 2009, EA put forth the “Sin to Win” contest to help promote the upcoming hell-themed action game Dante’s Inferno. It worked like this: Sweaty drooling men were invited to temporarily cease their Klingon high council meetings, and commit “acts of lust” with EA’s booth babes. “Acts of lust” meant take photos with them, upload them to Twitter, and hopefully win. As a prize, EA promised to give away two actual booth babes for a night on the town, along with a limo, paparazzi, and undefined “booty.”

The Bafflement:
Strangely enough, this did in fact offend people. Women, who are observant by nature, noticed that the contest “objectified” them (it’s cute when women use big words like that) by turning them into literal prizes for men. All of the women at Comic-Con became faint, and irrational. Thankfully, some man-leaders at the conference took charge of the situation, and used their superior mathematical and analytical skills to deduce that they were being made to look like cavemen. All around, the vibe was one of disapproval at the contest.
(image from Kotaku)

The Backpedal:
EA ended up apologizing for it, but then kind of standing up for it at the same time. To which I say, good on you EA. You can’t apologize for a “sin,” and still call it a sin.

4. THQ smashes a car in London for Red Faction: Guerrilla
The Deal:
PR manager Simon Watts summed up the whole premise pretty well:
“Because Red Faction: Guerrilla features the world’s most realistic destruction engine, we thought that it would make for an interesting experiment to find out how many people, going about their everyday business, would stop in a busy city street to work out some stress by smashing their way into a car to earn a copy of the brand new game.”

THQ had procured a car, loaded it with 100 copies of Red Faction: Guerrilla, conveniently placed a sledgehammer near it, and let passerby go at it. A simple crowd pleaser.

(image from guardian.co.uk)


The Bafflement:
Only in England. This would have just been another day in LA, but in London–where police still have whistles–it’s out of the ordinary for people to smash cars and take things.

The Backpedal:
From THQ? Psh! Everyone loved it too much.

3. EA’s “Mercenaries 2 Gas Giveaway” in London
The Deal:
In both the U.S. and England, EA did a one day “free gas giveaway” to help promote their 2008 action-adventure game Mercenaries 2: World in Flames. The tie-in was that the game is set in Venezuela, where gas is important, or something. Who cares, free gas! Muscly dudes working for EA dressed up like actual mercenaries (in camos and shit) perched themselves near gas pumps, and offered free, delicious gasoline until “the pumps [ran] dry.”

The Bafflement:
In Los Angeles, this went just fine. Everyone in America universally understood what a kick-ass idea this was, and was jealous they did not think of it themselves. In England, however, where gas is roughly 300% more expensive than it is in the U.S., a chaotic traffic jam ensued, security forces were brought in to keep everyone in line, and a politician got her knickers in a knot.
(image from BBC NEWS)
Lynne Featherstone (almost painful how British that sounds), a member of parliament, said “Whilst a lucky few might have got free petrol, hundreds of residents have faced misery.”

Haha, kooky British people with their feathery names and inky quill words like “whilst.” Chill out and enjoy the gas!

But they couldn’t, because of the long line (or “queue,” as the English say in their strange language). This disturbed the quaint neighborhoods of Hornsey and Wood Green (actual towns), causing the district’s Secret Garden (one in every district in England) to wilt. One British woman snipped, “This area is usually very quiet but look at it now, there’s cars queuing everywhere.”

The Backpedal:
Hell nah! EA didn’t apologize for shit, even though that feather lady demanded they apologize. Apologize for what? An American wouldn’t even know where to start with a sentence like “we’re sorry we gave you £22,000 in free gas?”

2. Capcom’s “body parts” contest in London for Resident Evil 5

The Deal:
In preparation for the release of Resident Evil 5, Capcom came up with the following (awesome) contest: bloody severed limbs, torsos and heads were hidden scavenger hunt-style all around London. British evil residents were invited to search high and low for the gory collectibles, in hopes of winning a trip for two to Africa. To win, contestants had to identify themselves by standing atop the Westminster Bridge, holding the bloody parts up high, and shouting “Kijuju!” Capcom reps were apparently waiting in the shadows for this “secret” signal. Surely, no one else would take notice of such a subtle, cloak-and-dagger gesture.

The Bafflement:
The tone of the whole thing took a hard left when a bunch of body parts “went missing.” No shit.


(image from gamezine.co.uk)

The Backpedal:
It was actually a health concern, as the fake body parts were put together with chicken livers. Organizers warned that “uncooked,” the parts were “dangerous,” and that they should be “disposed of responsibly.” More cloak-and-daggers from the Capcom agents. Translation: if you find a bloody head in a park, do the responsible thing–take it home, cook it thoroughly, and then devour it. You’re not an animal, after all.

(image from dailymail.co.uk)
1. Sony Decapitates a Goat for God of War 2
The Deal:
To commemorate the release of their bloody, Greek mythology-themed action game God of War 2, Sony threw a release party for the whole family in Athens! A decapitated goat lay on display, and attendees were invited to reach into its bowels, and pull out offal (freshly stuffed in there), and eat it. In another corner, people were pulling snakes out of pits with their hands. To keep the party going at the classy event, topless women walked around with their boobs painted, serving people drinks and dipping grapes into mouths. The entire event was documented in a spread in Sony’s Official PlayStation Magazine in May of 2007.

The Bafflement:
Words kind of fail here. How would you top this? Seriously. You would have to go above and beyond objectifying women, promoting violence in ways 13-year-olds would find awesome, and sacrificing animals in a hedonistic blood bath of an event that would make a drunken Conan the Barbarian blush crimson.

Damn it, we must try. Here is my idea for a more tasteless video game marketing event:
Ok, this is for a game called “Slaughterhouse Babes: 12,000 B.C.” It’s about prehistoric cave-bitches (from the future), and their bloody kick-ass adventures. The release party is in a “cave” decorated club. Women are boobs-and-butt naked, but with animal fur socks and wrist guards, dancing in cages really suggestively. Patrons (boys, minors) are offered cups of blood-colored absinthe, and hunks of fresh, raw bunny rabbit. The rabbits are being decapitated live in one corner, their pathetic squealings laughed at. In the center of the cave, young boys wrestle in loin cloths, with sharp weapons. The winner gets to European-kiss the head Slaughterhouse Babe, which will be photographed and uploaded to Twitter. The head babe sits on a throne, and for this event is played by an eager and saucy Janice Dickinson. Gah! Let’s stop there before we open a fucking portal or something.

The Backpedal:
Sony recalled the entire print run, all 80,000 copies, and issued a profuse apology:
“Sony does not condone or sanction any inappropriate behaviour by its staff or sub-contracted staff. It has come to our attention that at the God Of War II launch showcase, an element of the event was of an unsuitable nature. We are conducting an internal inquiry into aspects of the event in order to learn from the occurrence and put into place measures to ensure that this does not happen again.”

UPDATE: It turns out, the Daily Mail didn’t get their information straight from the goat’s mouth, so to speak. And neither did the writer who put together the OPM piece. That guy wasn’t actually there, and instead used a promotional pamphlet for the event as a source for writing the story. The pamphlet, Sony said, “employed a degree of hyperbole in order to encourage attendance.” So here’s some stuff to note about this whole (still weird) debacle:

a). the goat was already dead when it got to the party. No, Sony didn’t decapitate it themselves. Apparently a butcher did that.
b). offal wasn’t served inside the goat. It was soup, and the soup was served in bowls.

Did we miss your favorite video game marketing scheme? Let us know in the comments!

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